“Ghosting usually occurs at the beginning of relationships, when one of the parties abruptly cuts off all communication and contact for no apparent reason. They do not call, do not answer text messages or emails, do not show up for scheduled appointments, block on social networks and vanish like a ghost without offering any explanation,” explains Alexandra Sabal, a psychologist at our clinic.

How to recognize ghosting and how does it impact the patient?

• Those who suffer from ghosting usually feel confused, insecure, rejected and distressed, without understanding what happened. No wonder, he/she never noticed any warning signs, he/she thought he/she was building a nice, stable and solid emotional bond. It is an extremely hard experience, since he/she is left without a proper closure of the relationship and without knowing the reasons for the separation.
• The problem with ghosting is that, because it occurs so untimely, it has several negative emotional effects. For example, the feeling of abandonment and the lack of clear explanations leave the person wondering what went wrong, which generates doubts about one’s own value and attractiveness, affecting self-esteem. In addition, the uncertainty of what happened causes anxiety and stress, damaging mental health.

Keys to overcome ghosting

This experience is very painful, but also challenging. Overcoming it strengthens self-esteem and increases the ability to establish healthy relationships in the future. Focusing on yourself, seeking support and maintaining clear boundaries are key to recovering from this type of negative emotional experience. Put these tips into practice:

• Accept that the other person decided to cut.
• Remember that ghosting is a reflection of the person who does it, do not take it personally.
• Lean on friends, family and, if necessary, seek professional help to start psychological therapy.
• Take care of yourself, focus on things that make you feel good about yourself.
• Avoid contacting the other person.
• Set new goals for yourself.

Remember:

The person ghosting is still working on their emotional maturity and coping with responsibilities, and may be afraid of commitment, so they disappear without a trace. We all deserve to find a partner who adds and contributes positively to our lives!

Alexandra Sabal
Psychologist atClínica Ricardo Palma